Lying safe with you..

Have you ever fell asleep with that one person for the first time, and then found yourself not being able to sleep without them afterwards? Lately I haven't been able to sleep at night. I thought it was because of my stress..it may be that too..but I know that if I was laying next to him all that stress would go away. I don't want to feel too clingy but as I always say (well as I've STARTED to always say) feelings have NO rules. You're allowed to feel how you feel whenever you feel it (does that make sense?). Some people don't like to rush the feeling, some people can't help it.

When young people say they're in love and people sit and tell them "Oh please, you're too young to know what love is!" I feel like it's not entirely true. Yes, at a young age they don't really know absolutely everything because they have yet to experience a whole lot more. But that's my point.. There are a whole LOT of doors to open when it comes to love. That's why people always feel different when they meet a new love. As you get older, you open more doors. You find out that there is more to love than what you've had in the past and that's what makes it all so special. We've all heard or even said the saying "I feel like I've fallen in love with you all over again.." What do you think that means? It means you've just opened a new door. It does not matter how old you are, there will always be a new door waiting for you to open. It can be with the same person for years, or a different person.

Now, I'm not writing all of this to tell you guys I'm in love. I know I'm not yet and that's because I'm still afraid. Being in love with somebody is knocking those walls down and not being afraid to let someone else take the wheel. However, I can say that I am attached. I think about him all the time. I always want to talk to him. I can't sleep alone at night because I now know what it feels like to sleep next to him. But at the same time, I am still afraid. I have experienced so many heart breaks and dealt with many difficult situations and have ended up alone every time. I don't want to let it happen again. I'm trying though. At least I know I'm not being timed.

 As for the stress – I feel like I'm at that age where I'm seriously WONDERING about my future. My career, my living situation, my love life apparently.. I'm 20 years old..still YOUNG..but then again still an adult. I guess I still have until I graduate college to really start to worry? lol. But it doesn't hurt to wonder. Then again, it literally does HURT. I get so emotional sometimes. I'm anxious to have a great career and to be able to finally be happy and do things I've always dreamed of doing. I see so many people do it at a young age and I have so much ambition to just be where they're at! It doesn't come easy, but I don't even know where to begin! UGH *SCREAMS*

till next time...

xoxo, Gossip Girl .



JK. ( I've been re-watching GG, its catchy really. )

Edited this a few weeks ago. They're so DREAMY <3.<3

 Brian'ye :*